Good News about Jadyn!

There have been quite a few nights when I have peeked in on the Yikes and they have been on their knees praying together. Jadyn has been asking a lot of questions about heaven, sadly because our Uncle James recently passed away. Well last week after the girls were in bed, Jadyn told me she wanted to ask me something, but then said never mind. A few minutes later she said she wanted to ask me again. She asked me how she could let Jesus in her heart. Of course I immediately asked if it was okay with her if mommy came too. She very shyly said "yes." She prayed a very simple prayer and afterwards Bryn was so excited she was jumping up and down and couldn't go to sleep.

Here's the latest Bryn story. Bryn frequently leaves off the final "r" in long words. Like she'll say "sista" or "foreva." Being the linguistic geek that I am when I was talking to Jess about this I told her that leaving the "r" off is non-rhotic which is how they talk in New York. Bryn just happened to walk in right as I was talking about it and she wanted to know what we were saying. She asked us, "New Yawk?" She would fit right in with our wonderful family in the big city!

Jessa's new treatment is Thursday. We'll let you know how it goes. Thank you for your prayers.

Switching Medicines

We got the scan results today from Dr. Haley. Over time, cancer cells build up resistance to chemo medicines, and we found out that is now the case with the chemo medicine Jess has been taking (Xeloda). There is a very small one (so small it can't be felt) under her arm in the nodes and another spot of more concern in her left hip. Fortunately, there are many chemo medicines that are still effective, and Jess is going to start a new one next week. This one is called Abraxane and its in the same family as the chemo medicine Jess was first on called Taxoteer. She'll have to go in every week (with every fourth week off) to get it through her port, but although its a stronger medicine Dr. Haley said Jess won't get nauseous this time and there is only a small chance of her losing her hair again. It definitely wasn't the news we were hoping for, but we remain hopeful of positive results from the new medicine of the course of the next three months (at the end of which Jess will get another scan).

Prayer Calendar for Us and the Curtis Family

Terre has been really sweet and has faithfully made a prayer calendar for us each week. She does a really nice job of getting it out to our Sunday class, but as you know I don't do such a good job of getting on here. Here is this week.

Monday - Pray that the Lord will instruct the Kaylors and Curtis' and they will not be shaken and rest secure. - Psm 16:7-9

Tuesday - Pray that they will come to the Lord when they are weary and burdened - Matt 11:28-29

Wednesday - Pray that both families know that nothing can separate them from the love of God - Rom 8:39

Thursday - Pray that Jess's cancer will be completely irradicated - John 5:8

Friday - Pray for hope - Heb 6:18-19

Saturday - Pray that the Lord's grace is sufficient for them, for when they are weak, He is strong - 2 Corin 12:9

Sunday - Pray that as a body of believers we will continue to lift these families up consistently - Ephes 6:18

Scan update

Hi there!

Well, today has been a lazy day. I love those. It helps that it is dreary and we are having a winter storm watch. For those of you in cold weather states, in Texas, that means we watch the sky for bits of ice and sleet to potentially fall, which never do but still send us all scampering to the store for essentials we might need over the "watch". Just wait, because I am downplaying the weather, we will get 5 inches of ice and I will be asking my neighbor for milk.

I went to my scan on Thursday. It was fairly uneventful. The only small glitch was I could not give a proper urine sample when asked. My scan was first and they have you eat or drink nothing as to not interfere with the results. When I arrive, they pump you full of contrast (I chose yummy banana). Then they have you empty your bladder before the hour-long test. No problem. Then, I went to my infusion, where I forgot they always ask for a specimen for a urinalysis. One of my drugs causes high protein levels and must be checked every time. Well, usually I prepare for this by drinking water on the way into Dallas. I cannot give freely like my husband and others in my family. I think my aunt (to remain nameless) could give a sample at any given moment. I however, cannot. In fact the mere thought of this brought back memories of my childhood crying in the doctors office, while my mother patiently ran water, wet my hands, and pushed fluids until I could perform correctly. Well, after 3 glasses of tea, 2 waters and 45 minutes, I was able to get on with my infusion. I think my grandmother was about to go give my sample for me.

As I am writing this, I am realizing that this might be awkward and you might not want to know (TMI). But, you have to admit that you would have been more disappointed if I would have said, "The scan was fine, no big news to report."


I will find out the results at my next appointment on the 23rd of this month. I am expecting good news!!

Happy New Year

We quickly discovered that DSL is only fast after you get it set up. First the equipment never made it to our house. Then they sent the equipment. Then Jess and I have felt the complete opposite of high tech savy as we tried to set it up: would that be low tech savy? Anyway, we're up and running now. Although, I think Jess has definitely missed the Internet the two weeks she has been without I think she will love cruising down the Electronic Highway on her new MAC laptop.

One more change on Jessa's big scan. It's now going to be on the 11th. Her infusion was already scheduled for that day, so Jess is getting it all done in one day now.

We were watching Kaylee and Zander yesterday and decided to take them out afterwords to get ice cream. Thirty minutes later they they and the Kaylor kids we're all playing on the outside playground there. Jadyn came up to me very distressed and said Zander said, that he was going to suck her butt. I went to find Zander. I hadn't gone but about five steps when I saw Zander with his hand up in the air like Dracula saying, "I want to suck your blood." I guess there a lot of things you never hear when you have all sisters , but I think this is probably the sort of thing that boys say all the time. Five minutes later after Jess explained the confusion to Jadyn, they were all back to happily playing.

Merry Christmas!

OK, so I'm little late. We have dial-up, what can I say. More about that at the end of this post.

Let me add to my last post that not only did we have an ice storm on the day of our wedding, but one of my groomsman came down with a sudden case of diarhea-- right before the guys were supposed to enter the sanctuary. Thankfully we had a good pianist who covered for us while he ran to the bathroom.

My Christmas present is that my mom came down from Maryland for Christmas and my brother is coming tomorrow. Jadyn and Bryn were the perfect age for Christmas this year-- they were just as excited about putting presents under the tree from packages as they were about opening them Christmas day. Jess did a wonderful job assisting Santa via Ebay as she found a stuffed kitten for Bryn. The thing is Bryn had made a stuffed kitten at Build-a-Bear but it went away during one of the girls' Give-Away/Throw-Away days. Well, Bryn asked Santa to bring the kitten back, and we were in a quandry as #1 it was the only thing she asked for and #2 Build-a-Bear no longer makes this particular stuffed animal. Jess did a marvelous job of finding one and having it shipped just in time for Christmas. We almost a scare though when Bryn looked sadly at the kitten and said unlike her last kitten "It doesn't meow." However, after I frantically squezed, punched, prodded, and trampled the kitten that it does indeed meow--just for some reason-- the noise maker is in the kitten's thigh. I have a new favorite Bryn line-- courtesy of Christmas day. She was very excited about getting a Dora scooter from Santa-- she hadn't asked Santa for it. With a big smile on her face she turned to me and said, "Daddy... I didn't even order it!"

Jess has a treatment this week on Thursday-- no Christmas break for her. I think the new laptop she bought last week with her birthday money (back in September) and the DSL we are getting (for cheaper than our current phone bill) will cheer her up. Oh yeah, and there is the fact that hundreds (if not thousands of people) pray for her-- that's a pretty good Christams present. Merry Christmas!

Joyful Days

Today is Jess and my 8 year anniversary. Tonight we are going to dine in high style at Three Forks restaraunt. Even the gift card we got to there is classy-- it's a huge gold-colored coin. I think of our wedding as one that almost didn't happen. First of all our minister, Barbara, found out she had breast cancer and started undergoing chemo therapy. It seemed to me that she wouldn't have the strength to perform our wedding, but she did complete with wig and a smile on her face. Then, Jess rear-ended someone on the way to the wedding, crumpling the front end of her now barely driveable car. Amazingly, when the other car found out she was going to her wedding they started appologizing to her. There's further proof I have a charming wife. As for me, my alternator went out in my car and my best friend and I were stranded on I-35 in Dallas. We wouldn't have made it except Aunt Sandy spotted us and gave us a lift. I guess you could say that we have been dealing with adversity from the beginning.

The thing about adversity though is that God raises people to support you. Last year at our faculty Christmas party, Pat Cooper announced that the YJH staff had raised money for a new mattress (Jessa wasn't sleeping well because of back pain). However, when went to go buy one, Matress Giant decided to give a great matress to us so that we could use the money raised for other things. I'm getting tears in my eyes just thinking about all those caring people. Would you believe the YJH faculty did it again this year? The staff and teachers are very good at keeping secrets-- I had no idea they would do it again last year. The hard thing for me is that I will never be able to outgive those loving people there.

Jess is having her next scan for January 18th. We were trying to get in before the end of the year, so that it wouldn't cost having already met the maximum amount on our insurance. However, when they scheduled it for next year Jess quickly pointed out that each infusion which she gets every two weeks are $5,000.

The neatest thing happened to the Curtis family. A teacher at Wood submitted Aunt Jaque's name to KLTY's (a local radio station) Christmas Wish. If you don't know we lost a fabulous uncle, but Jaque lost a husband when James passed away recently. Well, Jacque's roof has been leaking and her fence is in need of repair. KLTY matched her wish with a local, generous family. The donor lost both parents when she was a child. Now she is donating a new roof and a new fence to the Curtis family. What a blessing.

Busy Bees

I don't know if it's the same thing in your family or not but for us as Christmas approaches we are in "hurry up and rest" mode. I think every activity/school/organization our kids are in has scheduled an end of the year program. I didn't realize how long it had been since we had last posted until both my principal and a fellow teacher told me they were tired of seeing the fall picture and could pretty much recite the last post. Oops, I guess I need to post more. Jess had an appointment today but as she and I have been moving in opposite directions today I only know two things about it. First she forgot her Emla (sp?) Cream. This is the stuff she puts on her skin before they inject the mega-needle for her infusions. For Jess, it is the difference between Wild Natives of Australia running at her and thrusting a spear into her flesh and getting a normal shot. She prefers for it to feel like a normal shot, so she was really, really sad that she didn't have it. Second, her appointment took long enough that she had to endure Dallas bumper-to-bumper traffic. Today could have been a really stressful today except that some precious people did things like pick up our kids, drop them off, fix our car's headlights, and bring us a meal (plus bannana bread). What an awesome church family we have. I think that our Yikes (younger Kaylor kids-- I decided today that when they get to be teenagers I'm going to start calling them Yaks) are getting more hilarious with each today. Today, they started talking about their grandparents and how much they like them. Only their grandparents have temporarily lost their names; today they were referred to as the grandma with a dog (Grandma Cindy), the grandma with Jadyn's color of eyes (Grandma Satterlee), etc. However, my favorite one was the grandpa with hair that looks ALMOST blond... hmmmm... would that be white? I'm not going to say which one that was. Also, I think the girls have noticed the way Jess and I handle things when they get stressed out because somethings wrong-- we usually let them know will try to fix it by saying, "I'll handle it." Well today, the Yikes we're supposed to have cleaned up and the living room looked like it might have been, but then I looked behind the couch. Without missing a beat, Bryn looked right at me and said, "I'll handle it." Then she asked, "What does that mean?"

Fall Days

Well, we have had quite a hard, busy, long, enduring couple of weeks. We have had a visitation and funeral that we all sat through tearfully and yet still in disbelief. I can still speak for most of our family in saying that it all does not seem possible, much like living in a very bad dream. Reality hit a little over Thanksgiving. We tried to do something vastly different, going out to eat and then to a family movie, but Uncle James was still greatly missing.

We have had several great family days, however. The weather here is beautiful and in the mid 70's. I took pictures of the girls outside and they turned out so precious. This one is one of my favorites. Tonight we will all goes to Six Flags Holiday in the Park, and we have another family meal planned tomorrow after church. We have all enjoyed being together.

Next week, I will go to have a normal treatment of my two drugs, one that will stop blood flow to the tumors in my bone cutting off their supply to grow. The other to strengthen by bones in general. I have not noticed any super human strength in the gym though! It must not help with muscle strength. I see the doctor again in December, where she will order more tests and scans to see how we are doing with this course of treatment. I am feeling well; I just finished my round of chemo pills, which will give me a welcome ten day reprieve of remembering to take them!

I hope you all had nice family time this Thanksgiving. I, for one, have been holding all my family a little closer. I know you have too.

Take care,
Jess
 

James Lowell Curtis

I am sorry I have not updated sooner. The blog site was down and our family has been quite busy.

My Uncle James passed away from this earthly world and went home to be with his Jesus late Thursday night.

It was, in these last days, what we were expecting. However, expected is not any way to describe the last few weeks. We expected to plan Thanksgiving with James bringing the chocolate cream pies he always makes himself. We expected to have the rubber snake for our annual white elephant gift exchange from Uncle James. We expected to play cards on New Years Eve with his family and take pictures of most of us all falling asleep way too early. No, we did not expect this at all.

But we know that our All-Knowing God did expect this. He knew it all along. He knew the days of James life before one of them came to be. And, we are grateful for the memories and the days that we were able to spend with him. He will be greatly missed here. James’ sweet son Zander said it best when he said he bet his daddy was up playing cards with his Grandma Gamel. I bet he is.

Moved to hospice care

My aunt Jacque moved uncle James to a lovely hospice facility in Ft. Worth last night. The transport went smoothly and he is very comfortable in his new room. The nurse there last night was wonderful and I know he will be well cared for during these last days.

James will get a bath today, a whirlpool one at that, and I can imagine how good that will feel after being only in a hospital bed for 12 days.

There is a nice area for the family, including a full kitchen to cook meals, a dinning room to eat at, and even a children's area.

Jacque took Zander and Kaylee up to the hospital yesterday to see their daddy for the first time during this hospital stay. I think it went better than they thought it would. Lots of tears, but a good visit.

It is a little final knowing this is the last place James will be. I am confident, however, that it is the right place for him now. James has touched so many lives, even while in the hospital. Every nurse that cares for him is affected by his story. So many nurses and doctors have said that they will go home to their family and hold them tighter, and treasure their time with them more. And, here is another place for him to do just that.

My aunt Diane told a story yesterday of what her husband Mike said. They were in with James and holding his hand, talking to him. Diane turned to Mike and and said, he just is not there is he? Mike said, no, he is not, can't you see...he is holding up Jacque right now.

That is such a clear picture of my aunt Jacque. She is definitely being held up by her heavenly father, and her loving husband. She is so strong. Now I can picture where that strength is coming from. Thank you uncle Mike.

Thank you for holding our family up as well.

Update on James

We've got to stop meeting like this. Me, crying on the computer. You, reading about a difficult time with our family.

My precious uncle James was taken off life support Saturday. We thought and prayed he would go quickly, but he is still holding on. He is stable and breathing heavily, but he is still with us. They have him on heavy morphine, so he is out. He does not open his eyes like he was before. He just snores :) Jacque said now we all believe her that he does. His brain is so damaged that he will never be James again. And soon, his brain will not remind him to breathe and he will drift off to be with Jesus.

I have come to the place in my heart today to be content with our circumstances. There is nothing more that I want from him than to go to heaven and be free from tubes, hospitals, and get his new healthy body. But I know that in a few days, or weeks, or however long it takes...I will miss not being able to see him every day. I used to want to talk with him and tell him we are here, and praying for him and willing him to fight. Now, I am happy to just sit and be in the same room as him.

However much we will miss him, please pray with our family that his time would come quickly.

I am feeling fine. Tired, physically and emotionally worn out, but fine nonetheless. Jadyn had her birthday party scheduled for Saturday, and we went ahead and had it. It was a fun time. It is good to be five and happy, and Jadyn is both. I am thankful for our close family.

Thanks to all of you for your prayers and support,
Jess

Emotional is not a big enough word

It has been quite an emotional week, and we are just on Wednesday. It feels like it has been (at least) a month.

Every time I let my mind sit too still for a while I start crying. This must count as still, because I am crying right now. It has been hard. Our family is so close, and we are such a part of each other's lives. Our grief is definitely shared among many. But, unfortunately, that does not make it any easier.

I knew my aunt Jacque was strong, but I have never seen such a brave woman. She is amazing. When she looks at my uncle James, she is looking straight into him. I don't know how you can have both sorrow and joy, but when she looks at James, she has both so clearly. She says often that she is so grateful for her time right now, able to look right into his eyes. Able to touch his warm hands, and talk all she wants to him. I am grateful too.

I went to the doctor Monday. It was an all-day affair. It shouldn't have been, it was just a routine visit. They were just backed up. I feel fine, and Dr. Hayley was pleased with my progress. I will see her again in December, when I will have my next round of scans.

Thank you for your prayers, your calls, your offers to help...it is greatly appreciated.
Jess

Zander

I love this picture of Zander (Curtis). He is looking out onto a sea of 3 Day walkers at the closing ceremonies looking for his aunt Judy. It is hard to see, but he is holding a sign. It says, "I LOVE YOU ANT JUDY". He does love his family so much. He is such a brave little boy. I think he gets that from his Dad.
Jess  

3 Day

I am so proud of my mom and sister, Jennifer for walking for a cure. It will happen. It will be exciting if it happens in my lifetime!
Jess 

3 Day

3 Day walkers finished 60 miles on Sunday!
Jess 

Happy birthday

Jadyn turned 5 Sunday!
Jess 

Go cowboys

Katelyn and Corbin on the star at the Dallas Cowboy Stadium for a field trip Friday.
Jess 

Katelyn's (belated) birthday

Katelyn had her 12th birthday party on Friday night. It was an indoor swim party and she had a great time, albiet a month and a half late! (She is in the middle on the top row.) 

Halloween Fun...with updates

The cousins had so much fun trick-or-treating together. They took turns (fought!) to push the door bell, sqeezed each other for a better candy position at the door, and ran from house to house, but when the door opened, they were all in one accord: "Trick or treat...thank you" they would yell to each neighbor. I love that our family is so close. They are growing up together...my biggest wish for them.

Please continue to lift up our family in prayer. James's EEG yesterday was not what he were wanting or expecting. He has damage to both front and rear lobes of the breain. His is on life support now and we are praying hard for him to wake up and be our miracle. But, really he already is. For he has lived each moment well, he is the hero of his wife and kids, he is a fighter, and he is a HUGE part of our family. Thank you for praying.

My grandpa was admitted into the hospital last night for low blood pressure. We just need our family to come home.

Jess