Thursday, October 23, 2008

A Hard Day

Today was a hard day. If you read my earlier post from earlier today, you know that Jess has been having nightmares. One cool thing-- when Jessa awoke from a nightmare while Kathy her nurse was here, Kathy immediately said we need to pray for that. I like a nurse who will look at the spiritual as well as the physical. As much as medicine has been a blessing there are just some things it can't fix. Jessa's color has been better and she eaten some (although she did throw up the little bit she had for dinner). Jess has also been out of it for a lot of the day, but she was definitely better today with understanding what was going on and who people were.

The girls still give her hugs and kisses no matter what. Jess has been insisting that she be able to do stuff today no matter how hard it is for her. She insisted on drinking from a cup without a straw which was very difficult as it is hard for her to raise her arms up (tumor in the right elbow, tumors in her broken left collar bone). Bryn handed her a card that she managed to open with difficulty. Bryn simply said, "Mommy takes longer than she used to." She said something then that made me cry. She has been barely whispering things lately so I had to lean in close. First she said, "I love you" and then she said "I love you more than I will tomorrow."

Of course with all of this suffering comes blessing. Jesus once said, "Blessed are those who mourn for they shall be comforted." For me the biggest blessing has been the number of people that love Jessica so much, a lot of them without ever having met her.

To continue with Jessa and my story together, let me tell you of our date to Sundance Square. Jess and I went to go see a movie in downtown Fort Worth in a fun area called Sundance Square. First we saw a movie, but then we didn't want the date to end so we decided to do something else. Now, earlier I had parked in the now closed down Tandy Center. I noticed that the parking booth hours ended at 10, so I figured I would get out of paying for parking since we would now be leaving past that. We decided to go to see a comedy troup called Four Day Weekend which was then performing after a play called Forever Plaid. They're much bigger now, but they were even funnier then. We laughed a lot. Jess has a sweet laugh. I have a funny one. Sometimes at my school, I will hear whole groups of kids imitating it which I think is pretty funny because how cool is a laugh that makes other people laugh. After we saw Four Day Weekend we headed back to the Tandy Center, but found an unpleasant surprise. Not only was the parking booth closed, so was the parking lot. There was one of those big wooden arms that don't come up unless you pay and of course we couldn't pay now since the booth was closed. The logical thing at that point would have been to call a cab, but that thought would only come later. Right then Jess and I thought of an idea that working together just might work. We found out that I could raise the bar up a little before it stopped. I was driving an Eclipse which not only was a really cool car, but it was also low to the ground. Working as a team I raised the bar and Jess drove the car as far to the right as possible and whew-- made it! We were jumping up and down because we had did it. Jess climbed into the passenger seat, I climbed into the driver's seat, drove the car around the corner and... there was a huge chain going across. OK we can do this Jess said. We unscrewed my antenna I held up the chain Jess barely squeaked by my foot and success! The only thing missing was Mission Impossible music. Tomorrow I will tell you what God told me about Jess.


Anonymous said...

I'm sorry it was such a hard day today but I love these stories about you and Jess's "beginning." Keep them coming! Jake, I called today and they said you were both sleeping(glad you are getting some rest Jake). I was wondering if you would be up for some of the F & F group to come and visit you. Call me at Gilda's if you are. We would love to come. -Ellie

Anonymous said...


I just wanted to share with you something that my mom did for my precious grandma when she was in a very similar stage under hospice care. My mom just felt prompted to read her the 23rd Psalm with her name inserted in it. She did this not knowing for sure when my grandma was listening or sleeping. This really relaxed and calmed my grandmother and seemed to bring her great peace. Just an idea.
Praying for you all,
Wendy Casas

G Pierce said...

We love you and are praying...

Alpha 1 Vann Clan said...

I am praying for peaceful rest for Jess and you tonight.

Anonymous said...

OH MY GOSH, Jake and Jess did something illegal - and now we have proof! Love the story!!

You are in our constant thoughts and prayers. I'm so glad that the girls are having an opportunity to hear the 'I love you's' even when whispered, has an unbelievable impact.

Love you lots,

navyjustincase said...

This is the Lord speaking straight to Jess. Please read to her, even if she is sleeping.

I know those who belong to Me, says the Lord. I know your going out and your coming in, your rising up and your sitting down. I know your thoughts and your ways. And, even in times of extreme peril and trouble, I will deliver you from the powers of destruction. I am your port in the storm. Run to Me and be safe. Do not be afraid, for I am with you to protect you and to surround you with mercy, favor, and grace.
Psalm 91:1-11 He who dwells in the secret place of the Most High Shall abide under the shadow of the Almighty. I will say of the LORD, "He is my refuge and my fortress; My God, in Him I will trust." Surely He shall deliver you from the snare of the fowler and from the perilous pestilence. He shall cover you with His feathers, and under His wings you shall take refuge; His truth shall be your shield and buckler. You shall not be afraid of the terror by night, nor of the arrow that flies by day, nor of the pestilence that walks in darkness, nor of the destruction that lays waste at noonday. A thousand may fall at your side, and ten thousand at your right hand; but it shall not come near you. Only with your eyes shall you look, and see the reward of the wicked. Because you have made the LORD, who is my refuge, even the Most High, your dwelling place, no evil shall befall you, nor shall any plague come near your dwelling; Ffr He shall give His angels charge over you, to keep you in all your ways.

I love yall,

Carrie Farrell

Anonymous said...

It must have been very hard to hear Jess say that she would love you more today than tomorrow, but I cannot imagine that she didn't mean "I will be able to show you how much I love you today better than I will be able to show you how much I love you tomorrow."

Give Jess a gentle kiss from me. I love you all!

love, Krista

Mike Or Cherie Stephenson said...

We are praying for you...sweet Kaylor family.