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Jess slept very peacefully today. I know how many of you have been praying for that and I appreciate it. Really the only time she showed any discomfort was when she had be rolled so we could change her gown and sheets. One of the cool things that changed is that she now takes her pain medicine totally in drops (the methadone was a pill) which really helps since she is having trouble swallowing.
Today Bryn ran up to someone who was visiting our house to drop off a meal. When Bryn got to her she realized it wasn't who she thought she was. She said "Hello... (long pause)... people." Then turned and ran back into the house.
When I first met Katelyn, Jess was picking her up from preschool. The first thing I noticed about her was her hair. Katelyn has naturally curly hair (which she now flat irons) and her hair was cut to her chin level. She looked like Shirley Temple. Jess was relieved that Katelyn didn't crawl to her on all fours and act like a puppy which Katelyn had been in the habit of doing when she picked her up. I don't know why-- three year-olds are goofy like that. Jess introduced me as mommy's friend, so that is what she called me for a long time until she called me Jake and then of course Dad and sometimes Daddy. Tomorrow I will tell of you of what happened when Jess and I took her to Burger King and of the ensuing embarrassing then but funny now story.
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I was just reading the blog and listening to the song playing - My Desire by Jeremy Camp - and the words said it all. "This is my desire...to be used by you." Jess and Jake, you have been used by God in more ways than either of you or anyone will ever know - except for the God who has used you in such a might way. I'm sure people have been drawn to our Lord through your lives and testimony and I know I've grown even closer to Him because of your ministry. Thank you for being His vessels throughout this journey. I continue to pray for you without ceasing.
Jake, I always felt so blessed to have you and Jess as Caleb's Sunday School teachers for so many years, but now I am the one being taught by the two of you as I witness your faith in God and your love for each other. I know how humble you guys are, but I consider you both, those rare people that God lets us meet in our life, the type of people that we never forget and that we thank God for letting us meet, if only for a short time, it is a memory and influence that will last a lifetime. Our prayers are with ya'll everyday.
Darin
It’s our confession Lord, that we are weak
So very weak, but You are strong
And though we’ve nothing Lord, to lay at your feet
We come to Your feet and say, “Help us along”
A broken heart and a contrite spirit
You have yet to deny
Your heart of mercy beats with love’s strong current
Let the river flow by your Spirit now, Lord we cry
Let Your mercies fall from heaven
Sweet mercies flow from heaven
New mercies for today
Shower them down Lord as we pray
Let Your mercies fall from heaven
Sweet mercies flow from heaven
New mercies for today
Shower them down Lord as we pray
Copyright © 1995 Mercy/Vineyard Publishing
Oh... and Jake- in reference to the conversation about crying: I don't shed tears much, but my heart cries out (mostly in song)... and my stomach hurts. I guess that's my way of "crying" most of the time.
But when the tears come and moisten our faces, I pray we all may think of His mercy raining down on us.
Send Your rain, Lord...please,
and thank you.
Wendy Smith
Jake, we see the truth of 2 Corinthians 4:6ff so clearly demonstrated in your lives: the invaluable treasure of God's glory through Christ held inside fragile common clay jars. We've seen the light of God's glory shine through Jessica's face, felt His glory in both of your spirits and witnessed His glory through your words and actions. What an awesome mystery it is!
"...we have this treasure in jars of clay to show that this all-surpassing power is from God and not from us. We are hard pressed on every side, but not crushed; perplexed, but not in despair; persecuted, but not abandoned; struck down, but not destroyed. We always carry around in our body the death of Jesus, so that the life of Jesus may also be revealed in our body."
The more cracked and chipped the clay jar (our physical, earthly bodies), the more of God's glory shines out! We grieve as terrible cancer destroys normal cells in Jess' body. We are thankful for the glimpses of God's glory we've seen in her life. We rejoice that Jess will pass from glory to glory; that God's glory residing in her heart and spirit will be in the immediate presence of the glorious Lord of Hosts, King of Kings, the Ancient of Days!
"Therefore we do not lose heart. Though outwardly we are wasting away, yet inwardly we are being renewed day by day. For our light and momentary troubles are achieving for us an eternal glory that far outweighs them all. So we fix our eyes not on what is seen, but on what is unseen. For what is seen is temporary, but what is unseen is eternal."
Also praying for your family without ceasing,
Liz Massey
Jake:
I'm amazed that you continue to blog on a daily basis; I know you must be exhausted. However, since you are blogging, I must tell you that I am enjoying your courtship story so much. Hope Jess is resting comfortably, and that you are able to rest also. We continue to pray for all of you. Tell Jessica we love her.
Becky Ward
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