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Bryn came in just a second ago and asked to go to bed. It's the Yikes bedtime but I was starting to get worried until I told Jadyn it was time for bed. She responded with "But daddy!" so I think the kids must be alright after all. They should be worn out though because I took them to a park for about two hours tonight. My friend Kyle lost his first wife right before Jessica was diagnosed. Tonight our two families got together for pizza and playing in the park. His two daughters are the same age as Jadyn and Bryn but I wasn't sure if they would play well together (they've met before but it's been a long time). One of his daughters asked my girls right away when their mom died. I don't think I would have handled a question that fast well, but for my girls I think it was a good connecting point and they shared right away. We all had a great time together.
One of the books that changed Jess and my marriage was The Five Love Languages. There are five specific ways to love people but everyone has a favorite. Jessica's favorite was what the author calls "Words of Affirmation" but he could have more simply said compliments. Mine is "Acts of Service" which is doing nice stuff for someone. We found out it's not enough to "do onto others as you would do onto yourself;" instead it's better to put yourself in the other person's shoes and try to "speak" their love language. By the way it also made a difference in how we love our kids.
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5 comments:
Jake,
I love your stories...so from the heart. Did you know we had a Volkswagon bus growing up? It was "before Jessa!" It was red and white...the first of the SUV's. I think it was our first brand new car and it could comfortably seat all 9 of the McNutt clan. I remember when you and Jess first bought the green van so that it could accommodaate Jadyn in her body cast. It wasn't Jessa's favorite car as it wasn't very "hip." I told her that it could have been worse. She could have learned to drive in a Volkswagon that continually backfired down the road. She laughed and laughed at the sight.
Love,
Aunt Sandy
Jake,
I remember I used to tell Jessa that she had the best love language...affirmations. She would remind me that there wasn't a "best" love language...just different ones. She taught me that just because someone's love languge wasn't the same as mine, it was nontheless a great one. I leaned much from this wise and precious girl...most of all....she taught me about God's grace.
Love,
Aunt Sandy
Jake,
I love reading the blog everyday. It is truly a testimony of the Romans 8:28. This would not be possible w/out the love that Jess left each and everyone of you. She touched so many lives and alot of people did not even know her except through this blog. She left quite a legacy!!
Love,
Carrie
Okay, I am not trying to pick on your verbage but you did write, "do onto others" and not "do unto others" This may make a difference in someone's interpretation! :)
That is a GREAT book. Everyone who is getting married or is married should read it!
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