Pick a Side

One of the things that has really helped me is going to Gilda's Club. There are lots of several groups at Gilda's Club but the one I have been going to for friends and family members of someone with cancer. There is nothing magical about it: it's just a group of people talking about our struggles and triumphs, but on the other hand having a group of people that share in your griefs and achievements just as they are going through the same thing is exactly what make it so special. The people in the group and I share a special bond and the coordinator for the group, Ellie, is phenomenal. When I lost Jess I didn't know I could still go to the group since there is a different group for those that have lost a friend or family member to cancer. I recently talked to Ellie on the phone and she let me know that I was more than welcome to still go to the same group. I don't know how more times I will go, but I felt it was really important that I go tonight. I was so glad I did-- seeing this remarkable bunch of people was exactly what I needed tonight.

I come from a family of very little sides. Whenever my mom would make a meal, there sometimes might be a side of vegetables but most of the time it was just the main dish. However, whenever I made the main dish, Jess always wanted to add a side. Even though she began preparing these herself it was still annoying; "Why do we need a side I thought?" However, I came to realize that it was her way of coming along beside me and adding value to our meal. I have trouble letting go of doing things that I do my way when it is good, but when it became our way it became better.